My family has always called it 'the cruel master'. I know in Clueless someone called it being 'couch commando'.
I'd just like the most understandable, so that the largest number of people will get what I'm talking about. It's a character speaking, or I would have just explained it, but I want it slangy--something you would say on a Sunday afternoon while fighting over the remote.
What've you guys got? *g*
ETA: Have used a combination of two suggestions: remote hog. Thanks, guys. Once again, the collective brain triumphs.