February 2nd, 2014


[ANON POST] LGBT Parents in Public School System in American Midwest; Coming Out as Trans

This isn't exactly a little detail, but I would be very grateful for any info on how children of openly LGBT parents were treated in the public school systems in the suburban Midwest (specifically Minneapolis) around 2000 - 2010. Research, well, it's not something you can easily Google, but my main experience is that I'm queer, and I've lived in the area; I just don't know any LGBT people with kids the right age. And I'm afraid if I attempt to Google it, I'll end up with some queerphobic . . . garbage about how children of LGBT parents turn out stunted or something, and I don't have the spoons for that.

I have a same-sex female-assigned couple whose daughters were born in the mid-90s. As far anyone, including the couple themselves, could tell, they were a lesbian couple. In around 2005, one of the parents realized she, or, rather, he was trans and began to transition. He was something of a public figure both before and after he transitioned, so going stealth was not an option, even if he wanted to. (He's white, educated, upper-middle class, and he passes as male easily, which obviously puts him in a position of relative--relative--privilege compared to a lot of other trans* people.) His partner was very supportive, and the two of them stayed together. So any info on how kids of lesbian parents and openly trans* parents are/were treated would be welcome.

Also, and I realize this is even less of a little detail, if anyone could recommend memoirs/articles/other stuff about how children react to parents coming out as trans*, that would also be great. I've read several trans*-related memoirs and articles, but the problem was that in many ways, the families I've found stuff about were pretty different from my couple: basically all of the families were going from being perceived as being straight and totally non-queer to being a gay/lesbian couple with a trans parent: from being perceived as totally non-queer to queer in two different ways; whereas my couple goes from being perceived as a one kind of queer couple to a different kind of queer couple. Also, as I said, the parents stayed together, so the kids wouldn't have the trauma of the divorce, unlike most of the families I've read about. Personal experience would also be great, but I realize it's personal and, again, not exactly a little detail.

Thank you.